I am a twenty-three-year-old man, and I am a fan of the female butt. I love butts so much, it's just that whenever I see a girl with a nice butt, I feel like either slapping it, grabbing it, pinching it, squeezing it, or touching it. I just want to know if this is perverted, or if it's normal human behavior?

So, you're an enthusiastic butt fan. People often admire, enjoy, or are attracted to certain body shapes, specific body parts, hair color and/or texture, skin tone, smell, etc. These attractions or arousal triggers are part of our unique sexual script. Sometimes we'll overhear somebody say, "That person is my type" or "I'm attracted to people with..." Your question, however, concerns your impulse or drive to touch a woman's specific, usually off limits, body part, and in specific ways — you "feel like either slapping it, grabbing it, pinching it, squeezing it, or touching it."

You wanted to know if "this" is perverted or normal behavior. If you are asking about your desire or impulse to touch women's behinds in the ways you describe, then that is probably within a normal range. In other words, some people probably feel like touching a woman's bottom in similar ways. If, on the other hand, you are asking whether the behaviors — meaning, the actual act — of slapping, grabbing, pinching, feeling, touching, and squeezing a woman's butt is normal, then that's a different question, with a different answer.

You can behave in such a manner if you are with a willing partner who is willing at that time to be touched in those ways. Meaning, it is acceptable to behave in this manner if you are in a consensual situation. A consensual situation entails being with someone with whom you have discussed this sort of touching; who agrees that it's okay, fun, and sexual; and, as a result, both persons are clear with what to expect and agree that this is okay. Even within a consensual relationship, however, touching, or certain kinds of touching, may be okay at some times and not at others. A partner has a right to say "yes" or "no" and to have that decision be respected.

So if you are able to identify the feelings you have, have the ability to make choices about your behavior, and are capable of negotiating these behaviors with a willing partner, then enjoy yourselves. If, on the other hand, you find that you cannot control your impulses to touch a woman who has not given you consent to touch her buttocks, as well as to touch her in these ways, then you are at risk for getting into trouble with the law. In that case, for the sake of the women you may touch against their will, and for your own protection, you need to get help.

Alice

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